talkbackapril

slowly, its all coming to an end.. im beginning to think that everythings not that bad anymore.. im coming to terms.. slowly…

its crazy why im able  to say this now.. i should be going out of my mind for something my friends said to me yesterday about him.. but im not mad or angry or in shock.. i dont know how i feel now. maybe im immune to this already. but anyway, they said its a good sign. immunity is the step to recovery..

i feel so much better now that i have listened to my friends’ take on the whole "experience". i can honestly say that they have been there for me and understood my moods and crying sprees and emegency tagay moments.. i love you guys!

slowly, its all coming to an end.. im beginning to think that everythings not that bad anymore.. im coming to terms.. slowly…

its crazy why im able  to say this now.. i should be going out of my mind for something my friends said to me yesterday about him.. but im not mad or angry or in shock.. i dont know how i feel now. maybe im immune to this already. but anyway, they said its a good sign. immunity is the step to recovery..

i feel so much better now that i have listened to my friends’ take on the whole "experience". i can honestly say that they have been there for me and understood my moods and crying sprees and emegency tagay moments.. i love you guys!

slowly, its all coming to an end.. im beginning to think that everythings not that bad anymore.. im coming to terms.. slowly…

its crazy why im able  to say this now.. i should be going out of my mind for something my friends said to me yesterday about him.. but im not mad or angry or in shock.. i dont know how i feel now. maybe im immune to this already. but anyway, they said its a good sign. immunity is the step to recovery..

i feel so much better now that i have listened to my friends’ take on the whole "experience". i can honestly say that they have been there for me and understood my moods and crying sprees and emegency tagay moments.. i love you guys!

45 things A girl would die for:

so true!!…

1-touch their waist
2-talk to them
3-share secrets
4-give her your jacket
5-kiss them slowly.

Are you remembering this?

6-hug her
7-hold her
8-laugh with her
9-invite her somewhere
10-let her be with you when you’re with your friends.

Keep reading.

11-smile with her
12-take pics with her
13-pull her onto your lap
14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. Fight back
15-when her friends say I love her more than you, deny it. Fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. It makes her feel loved.

Are you thinking about someone?

16-always hug her and say I love you when you see her
17-kiss her unexpectedly
18-hug her from behind around the waist
19-tell her shes beautiful not sexy!
20-tell her the way you feel about her!

20-you need to show her you mean it too.

21-kiss her on the lips
22-don’t ask her to buy you stuff. You buy her stuff
23-tell her what feels good
24-make her feel loved
25-buy her stuff. Small things can still help.

We might deny it but we accutally like and kinda want you to get us things.

26-don’t lie to her
27-don’t cheat on her
28-take her anywhere she wants
29-txt messege or call her in the morning and tell her have a good day at school, and how much you miss her
30-be there for her when ever she needs you, and even when she doesn’t need you, just be there so she’ll know that she can always count on you.

Are you still reading this u better be it’s important.

31. Hold her close when she’s cold and she can hold you too.
32. When you are alone hold her close and kiss her.
33. Kiss her on the tip of her nose; (it will give her the hint that you want to kiss them).
34. While in the movie, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin up and kiss her lightly.
35. Don’t ever tell her to leave even jokingly or act like you’re mad. If shes upset, comfort her.

Remember this next time you are with her.

36. When people diss her, stand up for her.
37. Look deep into her eyes and tell her you love her.
38. Lay down under the stars and put her head on your chest so she can listen to the steady beat of your heart, Link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens to you.
39. When walking next to each other grab her hand.
40. When you hug her hold her in your arms as long as possible.

41. Call her at night to wish her sweet dreams.
42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe away her tears.
43. Take her for long walks at night.
44. Dedicate a song to her.
45. Always Remind her how much you love her.

You’ll never know when she needs just a little more love.

i wish there isnt any reason for me to spill my guts here for all the world to read,… but hey?! wadaheck! everyone who knows me can see right through my happy mask and feel the sadness thats been bothering me for quite some time now.

well i guess it feels this way jud.. every pain, no matter how small, increases its power tenth folds at this time in my life.. at a crossroad.. where i am torn into two.. 

i know heartbreaks and break-ups are supposed to bring you down like this, naturally! but i  never expected to be this down.. i have been trying so hard already to move around and not think about the stuff thats been keeping me awake most nights.. i have resorted to crying myself to sleep.. but in the morning, this nagging feeling of dread and resignation comes over me.. then it hits me like a softball thrown in my chest.. its just me and no him anymore… "we" became an "i"…

i never knew how it all started.. it just ended and the realization of the way things are now just blows me away.. not because its all so clear but its so hazy and vague that i dont know what to do with it.,. i wish for somoeone to help me out but sadly, this person is the one causing all this… i  cant seem to make things right no matter what i do and the amount of effort i put into this.. maybe because its time to stop doing all the effort and let him do his part.. im not going to wait forever for him to make his move.. but i cant guarantee the things that i might say now will still stay true next time.. after all, ladies have the prerogatives to change their minds!

what im praying for is strength and the willpower.. to stay true to my feelings and not let anything get in its way..

i wish there isnt any reason for me to spill my guts here for all the world to read,… but hey?! wadaheck! everyone who knows me can see right through my happy mask and feel the sadness thats been bothering me for quite some time now.

well i guess it feels this way jud.. every pain, no matter how small, increases its power tenth folds at this time in my life.. at a crossroad.. where i am torn into two.. 

i know heartbreaks and break-ups are supposed to bring you down like this, naturally! but i  never expected to be this down.. i have been trying so hard already to move around and not think about the stuff thats been keeping me awake most nights.. i have resorted to crying myself to sleep.. but in the morning, this nagging feeling of dread and resignation comes over me.. then it hits me like a softball thrown in my chest.. its just me and no him anymore… "we" became an "i"…

i never knew how it all started.. it just ended and the realization of the way things are now just blows me away.. not because its all so clear but its so hazy and vague that i dont know what to do with it.,. i wish for somoeone to help me out but sadly, this person is the one causing all this… i  cant seem to make things right no matter what i do and the amount of effort i put into this.. maybe because its time to stop doing all the effort and let him do his part.. im not going to wait forever for him to make his move.. but i cant guarantee the things that i might say now will still stay true next time.. after all, ladies have the prerogatives to change their minds!

what im praying for is strength and the willpower.. to stay true to my feelings and not let anything get in its way..

history repeats itself.. if it hapend once, its gona hapen again for the second time.. i know, watch out! if it happens the third time, i should just stop fooling myself..

lately, it seems like ive been walking around in a daze.. wether im in  skul, at work or at home, ders no difference der. it seems like a balloon of plastic has enveloped me and nothing affects me.. its like being thrown in the arctic ocean, the cold stinging me like needles and pins until… the torture ends and a feeling of numbness engulfs my body until i cant feel anything…

when will i be released of this pain?

when will i find the ray of sunshine thats gona thaw my numb and cold body, thats gone embrace me with the feeling of warmth?

please let it be soon..

it is soo easy to assure others that im ok despite the the heartache that im feeling right now. its such a tough life and i refuse to give in to the temptations of breaking down.. because giving in would mean that you are leaving everything to chance.. and wouldnt you know.. chance is just like a a lil boy on his cute lil wings playing with his dices.. and i dont trust that cute lil boy with my life. i know that if i just make my own moves and let god guide me, theres no more room for chance in my life..

but its so sad that even if i strongly believe in this, i cant make him see that.. he would just sigh and say "thats life".. well i know that life sometimes is sucky but you dont have to go down with it..  not when theres so much love and passion between us.. or maybe im fooling myself that we ever had that????

*sigh* it sucks but i wont let it get it me….

Most people I know are looking for love – the single, the married, the free as well as the encumbered.

When I was young, I used to think that love was love. No qualifications there. Then, I grew older and realized that love wasn’t just love. You see, you don’t just love. You can love a little. You can love a lot. You can love deeply. You can love foolishly. You can love forever. And you can love again.

We are not obliged to love. But when we do, we just do. It’s hard to explain why we see something in someone that no one else sees. Why our hearts beat faster for one person against the rest. Why we can forgive someone for sins we cannot forgive others for. Why we love someone and not someone else.

It’s difficult to explain why someone can love another who is far from perfect. He can choose to leave or be left alone. But he chooses to love and let go of his impossible expectations. It’s hard to fathom why someone can love another who is so different. She can choose to love someone easier. But she chooses to love someone who makes life harder.

Why do people love even when they are not loved back? They can choose to move on. They can choose to forget. They can choose to give up. But they choose to love, instead, no matter what. Remember what the genie said? “There is only one wish I can’t grant you and that is to make someone love you.”

If it could be commanded to spring forth from a well. If it could be compelled to rise with the sun. If it could be bought at any price, love would not be what it is. It would not inspire as much passion. It would not bring forth as much grief. It would not be as precious and as sought after if it was not so elusive.

Love can make people swing from hope to despair. Love can make fools of us all. But we can rein in our passions and take full control of our emotions. We can decide to love and live and carry on with our lives, no matter what.

We can let love drain us. Or we can let love fill us. We can let love reduce us to dysfunction or we can let love bring out the best in us. We can let love siphon away our spirit. Or we can let love inspire us to write a thousand sonnets.

We can love. Or not love at all. But those who can see love for the gift that it is that can bring out the best in each of us, despite the grief that it engenders, can find love without looking for it.

One would imagine that only the lonely and unattached would be looking for love. And that would be so if love was attachment and not commitment. But as we all know, we can get ourselves attached to someone but not even the genie can make that someone love us.

If you are looking for love, you won’t necessarily find it in attachment. And if you’ve been looking for a while without luck, perhaps you’ve been looking in all the wrong places. Or maybe, you simply have to stop looking to find it.

living in a false reality, i succumb to the temptation.. so what? wats one text? cudnt hurt right?  eeeennngggg!!! wrong! one text and the world crashed at my feet, my heart with it..

i thought everything was going okay for us, between us. i thought that we could get by in this world full of uncertainties and pain and stick together, defying all the  evil. i thought that we worked things out already.. i guess i thought wrong.. one text and my sight grew dim, the world spinning.. or is it me who’s turning? cudnt get it, dont understand it, refuse to accept it…

i will try one more time and if all’s lost, its not my fault. i will try to brave the tall towers of indifference and the bullet-proof mask that hes hiding behind. i will try to save whats good and bring it to life once more. coz i believe that something so good and feels so right should last for a long time, as long as fairytales and legends.

i had my fairytale..  and i will live it like reality.

i had my lovestory.. and i will continue to love like theres no tomorrow.

living in a false reality, i succumb to the temptation.. so what? wats one text? cudnt hurt right?  eeeennngggg!!! wrong! one text and the world crashed at my feet, my heart with it..

i thought everything was going okay for us, between us. i thought that we could get by in this world full of uncertainties and pain and stick together, defying all the  evil. i thought that we worked things out already.. i guess i thought wrong.. one text and my sight grew dim, the world spinning.. or is it me who’s turning? cudnt get it, dont understand it, refuse to accept it…

i will try one more time and if all’s lost, its not my fault. i will try to brave the tall towers of indifference and the bullet-proof mask that hes hiding behind. i will try to save whats good and bring it to life once more. coz i believe that something so good and feels so right should last for a long time, as long as fairytales and legends.

i had my fairytale..  and i will live it like reality.

i had my lovestory.. and i will continue to love like theres no tomorrow.